i am feeling a bit depressed

I seldom read the newspapers...really, not much for the past 2 years i think. Ignorant about politics, developments in the world. Who cares about which politician is creating scandal again, which is embezzling the nation's funds again...occasionally only would i browse thru and scan thru headlines. [however i do agree that we do need to keep abreast with the info for the sake of our country, but that's entirely another topic]

but past 2 days I had some time so I just went to thestar online and read about the dragon boat tragedy. 6 perished. what that was thought to be a healthy & fun activity lead to a catastrophe. it's never good when injuries and deaths are involved.

I've been underwater a few times before. Playing white water rafting, the recent offshore safety course where a helicopter simulator capsized and we were inside it and had to swim out of it. or when playing with water. it's not a pleasant feeling at all when the water went into your lungs and you can't breathe at all. You'd panic...imagine those who drowned. the last few moments before the water fills up your lungs. all the moments in your life fleeting past you. :(

and for the parents and family and friends of the deceased, who would have thought that morning when Mom made a cup of hot chocolate and biscuits for her child before he went off for practice, that she'd never ever see her boy alive again. He, being in his rebellious years, probably didn't even tell her that he loves her, nor thanked her. 16-17 years...he'd never even attend college. would never have a girlfriend, get married.

Of course, this accident is the same as any other accident. Vehicle accidents, murders, fires...the school is grieving at the moment, but life goes on. They'll heal in months, slowly but surely. the best friend of one of the deceased would probably in a worse spot, never seeing his best friend again, not being able to hang out again and gossip about girls etc. he'll find another best friend, eventually. but for the families, it'll be in their memories forever. "if only I had not let my son...", "If only I had..."...so many what-ifs...things would and cannot be reversed. I read that one of the victims was an only child. :( Chung Ling High School, to those unknown, is a premier boys school in Penang for those who went to Chinese primary school (vernacular, if I'm not mistaken). You'd have to do exceptionally well in UPSR to be able to enter CLHS. The parents probably harboured all their hopes on their only child, and even the parents of the rest of the students...The day the child died is the day their hopes and dreams fell apart.

As I said few days ago, sometimes, we forget to be grateful of what we have until we see the misfortune of others. The times that I yell at my parents, at least they get to listen to my voice, 1 more time. The times that I was hurt by comments of a friend, at least I know that I am capable to feel. The times that I injured my knee, at least I am able to tread on the grounds. The times that I scalded my hand cooking, at least I am able to eat.

This feeling of course will pass. The appreciation of life, the gratefulness of having loved ones around us safely. But we are but only humans, we will forget again.